Caws Radio

Harry Potter and the Chocolat Jesus

I'm back, in Corvallis, after a busy few days. Thanksgiving was good; I ate food and dicked around at home. I was unable to play Excitebike because the plug for the Nintendo was here in my apartment. Fiddlesticks.

On Friday I saw the new Harry Potter movie. The movie is very entertaining, but for those of you who haven't yet seen it, take heed: before you can view the picture you must sit through 20 minutes of the stupidest commercials and previews for the most idiotic movies you have ever seen. I guess it's all for balance. Before you can watch this masterpiece of family entertainment, you must be reminded that Hollywood corporations still enjoy writing, filming, producing, and marketing utterly terrible shit for you and your kids to watch. After a CGI kangaroo had jerked around the screen for 30 seconds rapping in an Australian accent, I was afraid I wasn't going to make it to Harry Potter. One more preview like this and I knew I would be killed by the physical, tangible force of stupidity. Of course, before you get to see these warnings of impending crap coming to a theater near you, you get to watch commercials. That's right, you thought you could escape those tacky, schizophrenic advertisements for safer SUVs and obscene childrens' entertainment by turning off you TV? Wrong! They pop up on the big screen as if to say "Aha! I found you! Now, don't you want to buy this??" Once the movie finally started I tried to let the delightful little English boys push all these painful images out of my head. However, on my way home from the theater I briefly recalled the plot for a coming attraction called "What a Girl Wants," and I shook my head violently until my mind went completely cloudy.

Oh yeah; last night I sat through the film "Chocolat" with my friend Henry Weinhard. It wasn't bad for a sacreligious movie about a chocolate maker slipping drugs into her products (Oh, come on. You know she was doing it).